It takes a long time to come to terms with grief. I don't believe I will ever reach that stage as I am permanently full of guilts for all the ways I wronged you in the past. This what I truly deserve though, and if you found it in your heart to forgive me, I cannot.

I think I have been able to move on more this year. Although Gloria is often in my mind, I have developed a strong liking for a new woman in my life. She could never replace my Glor., but she is someone who I am able to love again. We have however decided to marry in 2023 or 2024, and this could be a turning point in my life. I will never forget or stop loving Gloria, whatever happens. With my disability, I am unable to visit her grave now, but that doesn't stop me from thinking of her especially in those days in the year that she enjoyed. She will always remain my number 1 love.

3rd anniversary in 4 days time and it gets harder each day. I miss her so much, it is painful.